Funnies At Work

-My first week of Winter Camp is at my rural school, and I want to do something fun. I decide upon a Harry Potter-themed camp since my kids always rave about him. I give Mrs. Chae, my Co-Teacher, a materials list that includes things for them to make wands, cauldrons, various drinks for mixing potions in the cauldrons, a big hat to turn in the Sorting Hat, large pieces of construction paper to turn into House banners, etc. If you don't know what this stuff is, Google search "Harry Potter house banner" and "Harry Potter sorting hat". Luckily, I prepare enough just in case she doesn't bring anything at all. Well, she brings in some stuff, something I can work with. No construction paper or a hat, no long pencils to make wands or paint to paint the wands, but I did get bowls and drinks. Some Coke bottles, tomato juice, and mango juice. Okay, I asked for blue, red, and green Gatorade, but hey, the kids will drink anything. She also brings in some Oreo cookies which I later smash to use as a dirt mixer. Potions class turns out alright, but it's mainly just a competition to see who will drink the nastiest concoction. I must say, these kids are going to be quite the drinkers. Downing bowls full of tomato juice, Coke, and Oreo dirt mixed can't be an easy task. The rest of the week is fairly anticlimactic, except for Thursday when I get to make ddeokbokki with the students. Ddeokbokki (DUCK-boh-kee) is a dish with rice cakes, onions, carrot, cabbage, sometimes meat, and sometimes cheese in a thick spicy sauce. Really good, and the students did a really good job! Click here for a pic of it The recipe calls for just a little bit of sugar, but of course the sugar bowl is completely empty after the class. The students who didn't care too much for the cooking aspect had no problem shoveling spoonfuls in their mouths. Mary Poppins said just a spoonFULL, not FULLS, of sugar helps the medicine go down! Silly Koreans and their faulty subtitles.

-For Christmas, I took a ton of clementines and Reese's PB Cups for the staff at my main school. They LOVED it. It was a huge ego booster and I got so many brownie points that day. So many brownie points. Couldn't even count them. Not one person spit on me that day! Okay, they don't normally, but they especially didn't on this day. On the way to school (I got picked up by my bud, Mr. Jang-a 40-something year old who acts as my personal volleyball trainer and teaches me the ways of a Korean), I learned the word for gift or present, just in case anyone asked me why on Earth I brought food to school. It would've come in handy had I remembered it correctly. I go downstairs at one point to see my Principal just snacking away at the clementines (since coming here, my citric acid intake has increased tenfold, it really is a main staple of Korean diets), smacking his lips and flinging peel everywhere. Good. My brilliant plan has reached the top of the hierarchical totem-pole. Yessss. All is good. Now, all I must do is tell him it's a gift in beautiful, unadulterated Korean-tongue. He tells me to come forward, to enjoy some of these clementines myself. I grab one, but no, he says, take three. I say, nay-nay! "This is a gift! For everyone (expanding my arms like wings), for Hyopo Elementary School!" He looks at me with a half-cocked head, turns to the VP, says something about gift, the word I just clearly said to him. Well, maybe I didn't say it clear enough. "Yes, a gift!" Still nothing. Luckily Miss Park, my Co-Teacher, walks in and helps the Principal figure out what I mean. "Ohh, so I've been saying 'newspaper' this whole time?" Great. Go back and substitute "gift" with "newspaper". Good thing I am okay with laughing at myself, and the word I really said wasn't something evil.